Gregor woke up hungry that day. The reason for this most likely was that he went to bed having only eaten a small portion of his leftover Thai food. He thought about how much he had to do on this day, and so waking up at 9am, he knew it would be good for him to get out of bed, walk to the fridge and make himself some breakfast. He could treat himself, Gregor thought to himself. He had eggs and pre-packaged pancakes and sausage and K cups for his coffee waiting for him in the kitchen right outside of his room. He pictured himself sitting at the kitchen table after finishing cooking his breakfast and listening to NPR’s Morning Edition as he snarfed down his fuel for the day, from there he’d go water his garden plants, which desperately needed some attention, he’d run to the store and stock up on groceries, probably some more breakfast food, and he could still easily make it to his 2pm tax appointment at H&R Block.
…Gregor woke again at 11am, realizing he’d fallen back asleep. He glanced at his phone. Holy shit, it’s 11am, he thought, I’ve really gotta get up. Gregor noticed he had thirteen new notifications on his social media application, which signaled a strong release of serotonin in his brain as his finger, like a hostage being kidnapped in exchange for happy feelings, pushed the social media application button on the phone to check the notifications.
…
At exactly 12:33p, Gregor saw an ad for a breakfast restaurant on his social media application and realized that he had to get up now if he was going to make breakfast and make it to his 2pm tax appointment at H&R Block. Gregor wasn’t really hungry anymore. His morning appetite had passed and he thought: cool, that gives me plenty of time to relax, get showered and get out the door and to the appointment. Gregor quietly reveled in this moment. He felt truly free. He felt as if he had all the time in the world. That big feral wave of serotonin hit him again as he nestled into his pillows and turned his phone face down.
…
Gregor panicked. It’s 1:55—should I call to cancel my appointment five minutes beforehand or should I just accept that I’ve failed this human being? Gregor felt his heart racing at the predicament in his mind. It was Tax Day after all. Could he file for an extension after Tax Day? Gregor picked up his cell phone to google just this when his phone notified him that his crops were ready to be harvested in his virtual farming game app. He’d been waiting 36 hours for this, so he took a quick minute to go into his app and harvest those crops, collecting lots of coins as the fruit of his efforts.
He pinched his fingers together on his phone screen, zooming out to look over the entire virtual farm kingdom he’d created. The great big wave of serotonin returned again like a giant tsunami crashing over Mount Fuji. Gregor was proud of what he’d created. He decided to celebrate by eating something, perhaps breakfast for dinner? Gregor walked to the main farmhouse and collected eggs from the chickens. He brought the eggs inside to his nice virtual farm kitchen, putting them inside of the nice virtual fridge, and decided he’d go lie down in bed for a minute. It had been a long day of harvesting after all, and he’d get to the fridge before sundown. He was sure of it.
©2020 by Brice Maiurro. All rights reserved.