“And I can’t stand up and I can’t sit down
‘Cause a great big problem stopped me in my tracks
I can’t relax ‘cause I haven’t done a thing
And I can’t do a thing ‘cause I can’t relax”
[Hey, just for laughs, if you have a timer, clock, or stopwatch, start it before reading further. Thanks!]
Improvisation practically vanished
(Say that 10 times fast)
Or........don’t
No sharing of emotions today
(I’ve had so many of those this week)
But for a brief period I’m in the eye of the storm
And I’m just...
Just....
I’m just gonna chill for a bit
Hmmmmm.......
Yeah.........
Uh huh.....
That’s right......
Well maybe.....
Nah..........
All right........
This is just....
Just what I
Need right now.
Sorry, I can feel you rolling your eyes and scrolling like a muthafucka
(How much longer is this?
What’s up with the formatting?
Are we there yet?)
I used to watch 3 hour long
Russian epics like Andrei Rublev
Deep, right?
Now..I’m proud to get through a few 10 minute episodes
On Cartoon Network
I have a Reminder app on my phone
To remind me to remember
It dings every. Single. Minute.
Until I deal with it
Because a lot of stuff can happen in a minute.
(Kind of like the minute we’ve
allotted to this experience
Right now.)
And you may be annoyed..
(I don’t blame you.)
After all I think I lied about the ‘no emotions’ thing
BUT!
You’ll be happy to know that we’ve almost reached
the magical 250 word count.
Our escape is so close....
No one can call us out
OK screw it.
There’s lots of stuff to cover
Lots of information to take in
And virtual hugs to be hugged
Yeah yeah yeah
C’mon c’mon c’mon!
Just....for a few more moments of your time.
After this paragraph there’s only one sentence left in this story. (And you get to help write it, because apparently I’m too chill to do this myself.)
Before you read it, take at least 60 seconds, close your eyes, and sit there and just......listen. (With your ears.)
Ready?
Begin.
Future reader of this piece, I know you have many, many options, and so thought it my civic duty to manage your expectations and share with you that my total reading time for this piece was _____________________.
©2020 by David Leicht. All rights reserved.